Letter of Introduction for the King
June 2, 2005
Fidel Castro
Director of
Dear Mr. Castro:
Some of your regime’s oppressive tactics toward its people were highlighted in a recent CIA website posting I came across. I enjoyed reading this article and found myself intrigued by you little island’s potential. (I especially loved the part about everyday being just like 1950).
During the course of the article it mentions that you were surrounded by yes men and I wondered if perhaps you needed another. As a burnt out computer consultant with 10 years of industry experience I am looking for a change and I thought I would offer my service to you as a professional toady. As you will see from my expanse work history, I have ample experience in this area. Here are just a few highlights:
· Currently, I am employed by an obsessive, career driven manager. From her I have learned the art of blocking alternate points of view and taking credit from them when they are right, not to mention the finer points of boot licking as a means of ascension.
· I have extensive escape goat experience. I have drawn attention away on several projects, most recently the failure of a 2 million dollar records management system, protecting all of upper management.
· My extensive programming skills can been used for the diversion of leisure money’s and other such pay-outs, or just for hiding all of your internet porn.
Please find attached a copy of my resume and transcripts. I will call you in a few days to introduce myself and negotiate compensation.
Very truly yours,